Hmm ??? Ne vem ne vem, a zdaj je pa ze "dovoljeno" posiljat stose na
tole listo. Sam sem bil pred kaksnm letom ali dvema prav posteno nadrt s
strani besnih narocnikov. Sicer pa sam nimam nic proti, bodocim
posiljateljem hate mailov pa sporocam: Tipka delete je odaljena le en
klik"

Aja Zenel a lista "stosi" se dela?

Pa se en prispevek precej zabavnega tipa, ki mi vsak mesec poslje po en
taksen zabaven clanek, na dnu imate navodila kako se prijavite na listo.

Leon
As if workplaces weren't stressful enough, corporations recently have
begun
to hire "Office Moms" to come in and, presumably, remind employees that
they
should have been a doctor or gone into the shoe business with Uncle Al.

I am picturing my own mother in the role of Office Mom, and I have to
confess
I think it would be enough to cause all of the Fortune 500 to surrender
to
the Japanese. This is a woman who sends me e-mail and then calls me
moments
later to ask, "did you get my e-mail yet?" (The last time she did this
I
opened my e-mail to read, "did you get this?")

Now, there is a lot about American business that I don't understand,
though I
still insist my idea for a pocket microwave oven would have made a
million
dollars if I could only have found an investor. But I have to wonder,
why
stop at an Office Mom? Why not give America a whole virtual family to
help
it handle the pressures of the 90's?

You probably aren't wondering what duties these Office Others would
have, but
here they are anyway.

Office Wife:
Stops in every once in awhile to remind you to fix the screen door or
that
you promised to mow the lawn today. Helpfully points our your faults
whenever you forget them. Does not recognize beer as a food group.

Office Husband:
Sits on the couch in your office with the television remote extended at
full
arm's length. Can't remember what he did with his list of chores for
today
(see "Office Wife" for the source of the list.) Continuously presses
the
channel changer on the remote unless he comes across (a) a sports event
of
any kind, including Iranian Bowling, or (b) Baywatch.

Office Brother-In-Law:
Still trying to "find himself," and apparently thinks he'll be
successful if
he spends most of his time looking in the hammock in your backyard.
Your
largest single unsecured debtor. Periodically comes in to tell you that
you
are letting your employer take advantage of you, that if you were smart
(presumably, smart like your Brother-In-Law) you "wouldn't put up with
such
crap." Then he pulls a beer from your refrigerator and leaves. Your
Office
Mom follows his visits with one of her own, asking why you can't find
the
Office Brother-In-Law a job. "Because he won't WORK! You have to WORK
to
have a job. There are NO JOBS where you don't WORK!" you respond with
strident calmness. Everyone feels you are too hard on the office
Brother-In-Law. "He really loves you," the Office Mom advises you in a
bid
to boost your morale. You do not want to be loved by the Office
Brother-In-Law.

Office Teenage Daughter:
Enters your office without warning and demands money. Wears half length
shorts which appear appropriate only for institutions with Girls! Girls!
Girls! flashing in neon on the outside. Shadowed by a lanky male youth
who
shakes your hand sullenly and twirls his earring when you insist on an
introduction. He looks like the Office Serial Killer. He touches your
Office Teenage Daughter's rump with his hand every once in awhile and
you
want to feed him to the Office Paper Shredder. The Office Teenage
Daughter
is particularly well suited to the night shift, since she cannot seem to
grasp the concept of "curfew." You have been instructing her lately on
the
concept of "convent."

Office Sister:
The Office Sister provides a contrast to your own life by being a Ph.D.
or
the junior Senator from the state of New Hampshire. Her house is
spotless
and her children are both honor students and clothing models. The
Office Mom
mentions the Office Sister with every breath, often recounting the
Office
Sister's accomplishments (starting with winning the spelling bee in
fourth
grade) in case you are planning to write an Office Biography.

Of course, if corporate America is going to furnish this Office Family,
it
won't be long before most people will be demanding an Office Bartender.

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Copyright W. Bruce Cameron 1997
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